Hello Sweet Ones,
Here is my offering to deepen your Self Care & Self Love practices. Remembering that Meditation is a practice which requires commitment, consistency and patience.
Please feel free to practice this meditation if you feel your heart is closed and you want to open it to the flow of love.
Posture: Sit in Easy Pose with a light jalandhar bandh (neck lock) Chin slightly down and muscles engaged.
Eyes: The eyes are closed, focusing at the Brow Point.
Mantra: Sat Kar Taar
As you say Sat, the hands are pressed together in Prayer Pose at the center of the chest.
As you say Kar (sounds like CAR), the hands are extended out from the shoulders half-way towards the final position. Fingers are pointing straight up.
As you say Taar (sounds like TAR), the arms are fully extended out to the sides and parallel to the floor with the fingers pointing up.
Make the transition from step to step a flowing movement. The movement is prayer position to arms straight and back to prayer. Create this fluid motion while using the mantra.
Time: Continue for 3 minutes to start & progress to 11 minutes.
Take a few moments after the meditation to notice the heart, sensations and observe what’s relevant for you.
Photos provided via 3HO
Sat Nam Beauties
I’ve been so blessed to be included in sharing my story on this amazing platform of Fraser Valley Yoga Teacher Blog hosted by the beautiful Wendy Weymann.
My name is Shae Savage and in the simplest sense I am a natural healer. I am a witch.
I work with women who are ready to step into their most fulfilled life. Women who are ready to dive deep into their hearts and walk an empowered, authentic path. I help women re-align (physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually).
I utilize my formal education as a Kinesiologist weaved with the ancestral knowing in my blood, my personal experiences, Kundalini Yoga and continuing self study to weave and formulate individualized movement and spiritual treatment plans.
I call myself a ‘Holistic Kinesiologist’ as I work with the whole person not just the physical aspect through retraining the nervous system, moving emotions through the body and integrating the experience.
I grew up in a small farm town in BC. The town is lined by rivers and trees sitting at the base of glorious mountains. My connection to earth medicine practices started naturally when I was very young.
From elementary to high school I battled with anxiety, depression and body image issues. When I finally found weight lifting at 18 this became a change agent for my life.
It was the VERY start of my journey to self healing. My diet changed as did my outlook on life. I shifted from being unhappy to endorphin induced highs.
The game changer for me to really restructure my life was when I had my first car accident at 19.
My whole world flipped upside down, it was rehabilitation that taught me how to respect my body and how to LISTEN to my body.
Fast forwarding 6 years later this marks where the biggest shifts of my life occurred. Here I started the awareness of a deep connection made between my mental states in direct impact on my physical states.
Hatha was the starting point, it made sense anatomically. I soon found myself wanting a deeper education.
An old friend had been asking me to try a Kundalini class for a while and I was resistant to the idea.
I finally went to a Kundalini class and WOW. Because of this class I was FOREVER changed.
I felt liberation. I felt free. I felt ALIVE. I knew that I needed this feeling in my life EVERY-DAMN-DAY!
Over the next few years a community formed in South Surrey where deep healing and profound growth was occurring. I found myself more and more in alignment with my purpose. I saw the connections and deep friendships establishing in my studio, Savage Yoga.
Seeing these transformations within myself, over the years of deep self study, and seeing them in my students is beyond humbling work.
I am now currently in Port Moody, offering local progressive series in Kundalini Yoga, Pranayama & Witchery. As well as collaborative workshops with breath, sound, kundalini yoga & cacao.
I guide weekly empowering Pre and Post Natal Yoga practices combining my skills and knowledge into revolutionizing pregnancy.
I have an online transformational package, Practical Magic: 3 month Mentorship program. Where we utilize astrology, kundalini yoga, pranayama, meditation, self growth exercises and somatic healing.
I teach a 100hr Kundalini Yoga Teacher Training, a 6 month Maiden course and coming 2020 a 100hr Pre & Post Natal Yoga Teacher Training.
You can also find me working in person one to one with my Kinesiology skills at Rocky Point Wellness.
Thank you for taking the time to hear my story. Let’s connect if my work pulls to your heart.
Sat Nam. Blessings Be.
Check out the next amazing Yoga Teacher’s journey here.
February 7, 2018
6 months have passed where I have had very few words to speak. Many thoughts to think with little coming to verbalization. I’ve turned away from social media, from my writings, from my practices, from my family and friends. I’ve entered completely into me. Into myself. Reliant on nothing else but my own breathing and the sound of my heart beat to get me through the darkest corners of me.
Running, hiding and escaping to the fullest degree in order to learn some hard and oh so necessary truths, in order to open my heart. In order to love without anxiety. In order to trust in my highest voice. In order to reprogram. Re-awaken and evolve.
I think there is this sweet misunderstanding of the reality of finally getting tired of your own bullshit. Sometimes we see it in glimpses, in a mirrored effect from others, and sometimes we need it to blow up in our faces in many different ways before the divine message sticks. Knowing this, I find time to cultivate a deep gratitude and maybe a belly laugh or two as I resurface into my newest self.
Being kind to yourself through the process. What does being kind mean to you? If your friend was suffering how would you show kindness to them? Through the carefully places words and actions? Through supporting and holding space? Can YOU decide to apply those same heart filled actions towards YOURSELF in times of need?
Diving deep into your own trust. TRUST that the resources you find within yourself are necessary lessons to apply. Those gems and gifts that can need to be dug up through years of oppressed voices and limiting belief systems, in order to be discovered. Sometimes it takes time and work to be in these spaces to develop our personal skills. Just like finding the diamond in the ruff.
February 22, 2019
Alas another year has passed since I’ve taken a moment to put onto screen what yields so loudly in my body. The reality has been that the creative notion to come forth and be heard, to formally and publicly speak my soul into the webbings of this wireless temple has been something I’ve not had energy for, avoided when I found that missing energy and feared for the world, for you, to truly read what I am offering.
Radical vulnerability. The woman I once was will not lay her bones to rest inside of me until I share her story.
For it was this time last year my body bled for weeks upon weeks, eight to be exact. A strong never ending red river floating upon guests of guilt, shame, grief, judgement and heartache. The energetics of me were depleted in the sea of red. This sacred blood which I revered monthly had turned into hatred. As I bled out so did the life that was growing inside my womb.
“I am I broken? Why won’t she stop bleeding?! Will this blood run forever? Will I slowly fade into the underworld?”
Truthfully, I died. Many times over. Greeted by Lady Death, her arms wide open. I had found my new home.
I had nothing left to give in the months to come. I buried myself deep into the blanket of darkness. Sickness. Immune disfunctions. Wave after wave. My body took a thrashing. She shut down and I tried to stay with her.
There were no lights, just a cocoon of an endless black void that would encircle me. Emptiness. Yet, in some way I was not empty. I was overflowing with emotion and sensation. It was this internal battle that presented the ultimate chaos.
The seasonal Spring brought forth more and more of my internal Winter. I couldn’t feel the sun against my skin, no matter how long I’d sit outside. I’d open my arms to the heat, touch my hands to the earth and tears would swell in my eyes pouring over in endless streams. The heart ache would pound against the inside of my chest stinging like salt to an open wound. Parts of me would beg to feel the joy of living. Of being alive, but Lady Death wasn’t finished with me yet. Writing this now, in reflection the heartache hasn’t ever gone away, there is just less salt pressing on the heart.
Some time has passed, 365 days or so, and my wounds have had time to breathe. As I have had what feels like a life time of rest. My beautiful bones can start to re-awaken out of the arms of Lady Death & into the world of the living. However small she still keeps parts of me with her.
Forgiveness. A foreign word in my English vocabulary.
A concept that I did not, and could not understand until I was ready. Until I made the choice to lean into the trust of life again. Through forgiveness I am able to curate love and gratitude, first for myself, my body, my womb, my heart, my inner child and then outward. The experiences through life-death-rebirth on a literal and metaphorical level allow the concept of living to be finite and wonderful.
I’ve been weaving into my teachings more and more the importance of the lessons that occur in the darkest moments of winter. The stillness. The Witch that I am awakening into is not afraid to midwife death & rebirth. Moving through stillness (death) that lasts more than 30 minutes. More than a few days. More than a week.
There are moments when all time and space pause. Your logical mind and intellect have no point of reference. All mind knowing gets erased and eradicated. There is only this space that is left of expansion. This dark void became a familiar place to which I had many times before visited not only earlier in my childhood, also in the dream world and in my pranayama practices. This void became the Ocean to me when I thought I was seeing a single drop of water.
There is so much beauty to be extracted when the light is absolved. Even momentarily.
This next series of blog posts have been written a year prior, reflecting back on the states of mind, heart placement and lessons.
The moving date approaches ever quicker than the day before. I am so excited to move, no more feelings of being unnerved. I feel like this is a huge clearing stage. As I release the physical items within my space I am releasing the stagnation that resides within my body. It is sweetly serendipitous.
I find it ironic how for so long I wanted to make a “home”, that I longed for the comforts of what society says a physical home will bring you:
-You fill it with stuff and people. Things that you like, things that are gifted, things that are inherited, things that are acquired over the years, things that are made, things that smell good, useless items, seasonal items, paperwork, electronics, random photographs of moments suspended in time.
For we never manage to capture the moments of sadness or grief in the photos. We only manage to suspend moments of bliss or sometimes moments of faking happiness for fear of the unsettled oceans within us rising up in a storm to be shown to the world around us. Captured in that one moment. That one photograph. In the eyes. Her eyes tell the stories of the currents raging beneath the smiles and the cordial hellos. I digress.
One morning, afternoon or evening along your journey you get a brilliant idea and decide fuck it! Let’s redecorate! Let’s renovate! Let’s have a garage sale! Let’s travel the world. Whatever your idea is the outcome is the same.
Create space; shift the stagnation of energy around and within you. For me there is nothing like selling it all and consciously stepping into minimalism to find out what you really truly require.
There are moments, don’t get me wrong where I see emptiness and I immediately want it filled. I want the space in the corner or the naked walls to showcase life by having something to occupy that space. How fitting is it that when you start to find space, you fear the perceived emptiness of the space.
Your views can become skewed with what once felt like freedom can feel vast and unsettling. How interesting is it that we find ways to take up space to feel full?
Through consumption of more shit we don’t need in our homes.
We consume foods that we don’t really need to eat just to feel full.
We consume people, jobs, conversations, drugs, alcohol and social media to feel fulfilled within our lives.
How much of this are we actively participating in and how much is so deeply engrained that we are on autopilot within our own lives. Like when you drive home from work and arrive in your driveway without recalling if you even stopped at any of those red lights or stop signs. I mean you must have because you made it to your driveway without getting into an accident, but were you actively participating in each moment that contributed to the arrival of you in your driveway?
How many other times have you “checked out” throughout your day in your own life?
I feel that the last 10 years of my life have been fast tracked. I have been exposed and placed into circumstances that I never thought I would survive emotionally and mentally. Guess what. I did. I thrived because of them. All of the heart breaks, the losses, the injuries, the abuse, the tears and grieving all were blessings in the softening and awakening of me. Of discovering who I am and why I am here.
Last year, I learned about this Goddess, Akhilandeshvari, is the goddess of “never not broken”. She is constantly in a state of being broken and rebuilding herself. This is a beautiful opportunity to find a limitless within each of us.
As we rebuild ourselves over and over again. As we commit to doing the personal work we are never the same and forever changed. Forever changed. After each bruise, strain, sprain, break, loss, beating, drowning we are reborn into a new version of ourselves. Our cells do it naturally without our bodies. They are constantly in a cycle of life/death/life. Our bodies heal after physical trauma. We rebuild our tissues, bones and bodies from the inside out.
When we look at Akhilandeshvari she reminds us that there is a definite opportunity to create something new and amazing after and throughout each experience.
For me I believe my heart has been stretched, pulled, bruised and broken in so many different ways so that it can house more compassion, understanding, acceptance and love for all areas of myself and others. This process is a continuously journey as I grow.
I have the ability to love myself deeply enough to have boundaries. I love myself deeply enough to still have compassion and empthy for others. To see, to hear and to choose what suits me and my highest potential.
I am a proud Scorpio woman who is committed to her fucking work (Yes I swear and it’s a powerful practice when used towards igniting passion). I’ve shed some deep layers over these past years and I am not blind to the fact that life is a journey of shedding and growing. I am always looking for more self evolution and expansion.
“Why? You might ask, it seems like a daunting and intense task that is not made for the weak of heart.”
Well you’re exactly right. It’s a life’s journey. A life’s work. Constant seeding and weeding of your subconscious garden.
Why would you not want to work on loving yourself so fiercely through each and every moment. To knowing, remembering yourself so intimately. You are the only person you are guaranteed to be with for your whole life. Why not get to know and discover every single layer of you. Become in awe of your personal evolution.
Why not show up everyday to clear the garbage of the subconscious to be the best version of yourself that you can be. To inspire others to embrace both their light and their dark. To help ease this divide. This loneliness. This separateness. This mental and emotional damage we do to each other because at the end of the day we just want someone to understand us. To love us wholly and completely through all the flaws and all the beauty.
Photo by Novastock / Rex Features ( 941297e )
I have weaved my way through my 29 years in and out of romantic relationships with men mostly long term, some short and sweet others short and spicy. Society, family and friends have had their opinions on this. They range from supportive to extremely judgmental.
I have been told my whole life that I have “too high of expectations in relationships”. Let’s break that down a little. Once you have expectations the other party will always lose and you project your disappointment, anger, sadness or resentment. No one can be held to any standard that you place on them, it is absolutely impossible. Friend, family member or parter. When you put someone up on a pedestal the only way for them to go is down. That human, circumstance or thing will never be able to achieve a ‘passing grade’ in your eyes.
I had developed Egoic-conditioning of self to hold personal high standards (impossible standards) on myself which have been crumbling down through this humbling work of owning your own shit. Don’t get me wrong they are still there! Just not to such a rigid degree- slowly but surely this is a life’s work.
Knowing your worth and setting healthy boundaries is essential. So instead of offering up the view of “too high of standards” I view it from a place of honour that I have a choice to find someone who is also an amazing human. I am single because I choose to be. Not because something is “wrong” with me or because I require a relationship as most of society views women who are approaching 30 and are single. I am not searching to have the white picket fence life. I will not settle out of convenience to make others comfortable.
I really and truly believe if you want to know yourself. Next level type of talk.
Get into a romantic relationship.
HELLLLLLO triggers, you will have many beautiful opportunities to work on your shit. The bullshit that you cover up will be presented to you over and over. The relationships in your life are all mirrors at the areas within you that you illuminate and the areas to which you require work.
The mirrors shine back at you all of your humanness that you pretend you don’t have. It shines the wrinkles in your perfectionist beliefs; it disintegrates your “all put together exterior”.
Being in relationships forces your humanness to show. You know that humanness I am speaking of because it is those areas of yourself that you reject. You reject it because it is uncomfortable to be with, to feel or to admit to yourself. It’s the layers of anger, grief, jealously, insecurities, abandonment, rejection, fear, worry, shame, hurt, guilt, unworthiness, unlovable, judgment, the self destruction, over- analyzing, the too sensitive, too emotional, too anything mentality.
All of these human stories and belief systems arrive in full force in the face of relationships. And this my friends is where the work begins.
It is here when these feelings and thoughts arrive I greet them for I have this natural affinity to dive deep in the subconscious. Head first. Scared as fuck. I dive deep into the waters of the psyche. At times it can feel dark and scary. It can feel like every time I surface for air I get hit with another wave. Again and again and again. No space for air or breath. I sometimes forget I know how to swim. But that inner knowing, that remembering gets stronger and stronger the more I surrender to the waves. The more I remember that I was born to breathe under water and fly above the waves. The more I listen with the intent to understand the lessons being presented. The more I find comfort within my humanness, within my darkness the more I understand about myself.
I am packing up my life as I know it today. Here in the now and taking the biggest chance of my life to date. TRUSTING that where I am headed will allow me to step into myself and grow, stretch and expand to depths beyond what I could imagine.
I am in the process of minimizing my life to travel the world. Singularly. A woman on a journey to share, explore and expand her gifts.
What am I searching for you might ask? Nothing directly, but I am looking to share in new life expanding experiences. Those moments at the end of the day where you reflect and feel full. Where your heart is over flowing with love, connection and happiness. I find that when I travel. I find that when I am deeply in love with my life. I find that when I can step into nature, into cultures and communities that are outside of my day to day city-suburban cement life.
I have two weeks left in my small coach home. I love this place, it’s light, airy, quiet, I hear the frogs every evening, the coyotes singing and the rain when it falls on the deck outside my bedroom. I ask myself why bother leaving sometimes… this has been a very quick transition for me. I’ve only been in this slice of heaven for a year, exactly, May 2016 I moved in. May 2017 I’m moving out. I can’t seem to make it more than a year in one place at a time. There’s this unsettled restlessness that comes in waves. I can feel when a shift needs to occur and I trust that calling. Even though on the outside it may be perceived with judgement.
I made up my mind about a month ago. I was sitting in meditation one morning and this very soft voice said “Shae, what if you were to sell all of your belongings and pack up your essentials so that you could go travelling whenever you wanted to?”. Immediately this authoritative voice stepped in, “That’s stupid! Why would you even think that. You have a business and a life here.” That was the end of the conversation. Within a week external circumstances arose and reaffirmed that little voice in my mind was the direction I needed and I heeded the call without reservation. This call, the kind that you get from this very assured place deep within you. Yeah. That one. She called to me. She pulled me and I trusted. I surrendered to her words and guidance and gave my landlords my one month notice within 3 days of this life altering decision.
Packing my life into about 20 boxes, selling my belongings and moving in with my father for the rest of the year. This is such a beautiful opportunity to heal some deep family wounding’s. That is an entirely different story for another journey.
I am actively releasing my addiction to perfectionism, the fear of being seen and heard. I am releasing the fear of rejection by allowing myself to write within my streams of consciousness on a public forum.
This is exactly how you will find reading this material. It will be full of raw emotion, my personal thoughts and experiences. There will be run on sentences, made up words and grammatical errors. Welcome to the real world.
So who the hell am I? Wow, here I am about to be the most raw and honest to a whole world of the unknown.
Holy shit… well sit back sweet friends for this is a tale, a journey, a roller coaster ride that I am about to share and embark on with you now…. Where to start… How to start… That’s the question I’ve been looking to answer my entire life.
“Who Am I?” Three words, one question with about a million answers from the superficial to the profoundly deep. One perfect set of words more powerful than we give credit to. If we strip away the societal standards, titles and expectations, who are you?
I’ll answer that in a few ways. By society’s views I am a 29 year old woman who grew up in a small town in British Columbia, Canada. I am by profession an established Kinesiologist, for those of you who doesn’t speak in medical terminology it means a kinaesthetic movement therapist. I specialize in human physical rehabilitation, movement therapy, nervous system recalibration and retraining, injury analysis, a specialist for injury prevention and education. I have worked for an esteemed back injury company for many years with extensive experience in dealing with insurance and disability claims, acquired brain injuries, co-facilitating anxiety and depression groups, facilitating hydrotherapy programs, work conditioning programs, conducting job site visits, job demands analysis, rehabilitating physical and mental injuries, office and industrial ergonomics, biomechanical posture and movement assessments, corporate education on injury prevention.
When you really write it all down it sounds very complex. It’s really not. To me anyways. I love the body and it’s intelligence, anatomy, movement, education and prevention. I love finding a way to make all of this accessible and relevant to various industries and people. We all can relate because we all have a body! We know aches, pains, injuries, struggles and the complexity they bring to our lives. It can be so helpful to find validation, answers and peace of mind when someone can relate difficult information and simplify it so that it is practical and tangible.
I feel that societies expectation of me as a young woman has been very domesticated: Mission is to find a man, get married, have kids, buy a house and raise a family, watch my family grow up and then look at living and fulfilling my own personal goals and dreams. Well, my friends, I did want that at one point in my life and I had the starting phases of it too. I respect everyone’s journey but that just wasn’t mine. Not to say I don’t still want those things…. Just not in that order.
That linear structure to life was what I believed to be true, there was no other way of living. It had been so deeply engrained into my psyche all these years. I was not conscious of this patterning. I actively took on setting such ridged guidelines and timelines for my life. To control and plan every detail out to ensure that I got the most out of what I was investing into: Graduate high school at 18 years old. University next. Age 22, graduate with your bachelor degree. Find a job, work in your field. Be in a long term relationship. Move in together. Buy a house. Get a dog. Get married. Have children. Raise children. Well you know the typical suburban story.
And for me I achieved it. In that order. Minus the children. With fierce focus, unwavering diligence, intellectual precision and ruthless self control. I sacrificed so much of my natural state. My mental health, emotional health and physical wellness. There was no room for error or life to flow naturally. I had my life on a tight leash or so I thought.
I woke up from this deep slumber in a place I had no recollection of. I knew I created my reality and was deeply depressed. I couldn’t figure out why I had gotten everything that I had planned for and felt like I was at this losing end against time. I was so disconnected from my heart, my dreams, my souls purpose and nature. I was numb. I couldn’t laugh, couldn’t cry, couldn’t love or access any of my emotions which I had always used as huge anchors in my life. This was the start of the discovery of “Who am I”.
So here I am now, 4 years later. Who am I? I am PROUD to answer this question.
I am: A WOMAN. Movement goddess. Medicine woman. Child of the Earth. Healer. Ceremonialist. Wild. Untamed. Unashamed. Kundalini Yoga Teacher. Creative Movement Therapist. Educator. Business owner. Lover. Passionist. Feminine. Soulful. Teacher. Student. Explorer. Adventurer. Mother. Maiden. Crone. Witch. Scorpio. I am here learning.
What do I do? I take you through a journey through your body and emotions. Pulling from various trainings in yoga (hatha, Kundalini, yin, restorative), rewilding principles, dancing, mantra, mudra, community, connection, pranayama, posture recalibration, rehabilitation movements and education, personal application and experience.
I am formally trained in Hatha, Yin, Kundalini, Pre-Natal Yoga, Therapeutics and Pranayama. The majority of my teachings come from my personal applications and deep integrations of these practices as well as working closely with my students.
After that extensive introduction I hope you can share on this next journey of a lifetime with me because that is what life is all about. Sharing, connecting, relating and inspiring others.
Sat Nam (I am my truth)